Toxic
by desyderia
Summary: "This is not your battle to fight, Oliver!", she told him. "I'll never be able to wash out this blood on my hands"... When things drastically change, Oliver will finally realize that Felicity doesn't need him to be in danger. He needs to step up and save her from the her own demons, even if her darkness is ready to engulf them both...


She closed her eyes and slowly drifted to sleep. She didn't think sleep could claim her tonight but she was tired and her body ached so much that despite the energy she felt inside, sleep mercifully claimed her not even 30 seconds after hitting the pillow. She hoped she wouldn't of Oliver tonight, at least not tonight. She couldn't bear yet another erotic dream of her vigilante, she was too drained emotionally after the close call that almost took Lyla's lefe today. She shuddered thinking what would have happened if Lyla wouldn't have been so lucky and Caitlin wouldn't have been around to take charge and help her save Lyla's life. These were the thoughts in Felicity's mind as she lay in her bed that night. The look on Oliver's face when he saw Lyla laying there on the table as they saw Sara's inert body months ago in the same place, her blood everywhere, including on Felicity's hands, was too much to take in. She knew he was stupidly blaiming himself again as it was the case with everything bad that happened in their life and she her heart broke again in little pieces. She have to let him go in her heart, if she wanted to stay sane, she would have to save herself from him even if the thought was unbearable.

These thoughts brought bitter tears in her eyes as she drifted to sleep that night, fully unaware that from her bedroom window, a pair of familiar green eyes watched her crying silently before slipping away... She didn't know that ever since she found out that Arrow was Oliver Queen, even before he recognized the feeling he had for his favorite hacker girl, he watched her go to sleep almost every night. Only when Felicity was tucked in bed and safe, he would allow himself to relax enough to take off his suit and get some rest. But even then, Felicity was present. He should really feel ashamed of his wet dreams. What he did to her in his dreams made him blush even during the day when he watched Felicity. How he longed to slip inside her room and take her in his arms and never let her go. Damn, he would suffocate her, that's how dependent he was of her and it scared him like nothig else have. Deep down Oliver knew that the facade he put for himself mainly that he would protect her better if let her have a life without him was only hiding the truth: he was scared that the intensity of his love for Felicity would consume them both. He would kill for her, he would let loose the animal he was inside, he would threw away all his principles and he would stop of nothing for Felicity. She was pure and inocent and he was toxic, he had to be, otherwise why did he felt that darkness inside with his every action? Only Felicity could save him from himself, from the darkness, she had since that first moment he walked into her office...

He saw her tears and he almost gave in and enter her bedroom, but he stopped himself. He knew that it was inevitable, the day when he will snap and let his feeling claim him was so close that he almost relished it. Even when he fought it, he knew Felicity was his. There was no other way. His blood boiled only thinking of the kiss that she shared with Ray. It was a miracle he managed to walk away and not rip the fucker's head off and take Felicity right there, on her desk. These thoughts terrified him as nothing else, not even the 5 years of hell weren't as terrying as what felt right now. If only Felicity would know that real danger was him, the man that was her friend for so long, the man that saved her so many times. But she will know soon enough.

The morning came with a headache for Felicity. She groaned as she massaged her temples while sipping on her latte and trying to listen to the ingineer she had video-conferance with. Twenty minutes later Ray entered babbling in her office, looking a little more nervous than usual.

"What's up, boss?"

"You ok? Technically I shouldn't answer your question with another question, but you seem to be out of sorts. Rough night?" , he asked.

Felicity blushed a little remembering the vivid dream she had last night and a particular hooded vigilante who did some pretty rough training between her legs and answered. "If you only knew...".

Ray's eyes widened a little and his expression darkened, "Oh, I didn't know you love to spend your nights in unsettling settings..." .

Felicty opened her mouth to say something but her phone choose that moment to ring and Oliver's face greeted her on the screen. "Sorry, do you mind if I take this call?" she asked watching Ray unsurely, who was busying himself looking at something on his tablet. He nodded, trying not to look interested on why did OIliver Queen called Felicity. He ignored the pang of jelousy he felt when he saw Felicity's expression change when she saw who was calling her, he had seen the look on Queen's face. It was dangerous, it warned him not to mess with his woman even if Felicity wasn't technically his. But Ray wouldn't give her up just because Oliver Queen didn't have the balls to secure her for himself. He had his chances, now it was Ray's shot and he would be damned if he let Felicity slip away from him. With that thought in mind he finally decided it was high time he would do what Queen didn't do, he will involve Felicity in all his secrets and make sure she was as attached to him as he was already with her. He watched the prototype of his tablet of the new female suit he created alongside with The Atom one. Felicity will be spectacular, he knew that already. Stupid Queen had refused to train her to her full potential but he won't hold back. Felicity possesed a strenght inside that just called to him. Oliver Queen didn't make his moove yet but he will, Ray knew he will and he understood it really. This woman was too mouthwatering to be left alone.

Yes, she will make a great warrior. And he will fully enjoy training her...


End file.
